Healing Your Relationship With Money: Stop Using Money as an Excuse

In this episode of the Manifest That Shift podcast, Kelly Noble tackles the tough love topic of how we use money as an excuse to avoid stepping into our power. She breaks down why scarcity is an energy and mindset that isn’t tied to your financial status and how unconscious spending often keeps us stuck in a scarcity loop. Through a powerful exercise, Kelly helps you get clear on your values, align your financial decisions with them, and stop sabotaging your wealth-building efforts. Whether you’re just starting your business or already making millions, this episode will push you to question your relationship with money, stop making excuses, and focus on true financial alignment.

-Discover why scarcity is a frequency, not a financial status.

-Get real about the excuses you're using when it comes to time and money, and learn how to stop self-sabotaging.

-Gain practical tools to align your financial choices with your core values and start investing in what truly matters.

-Kelly's no-BS approach will push you to question your financial decisions and take ownership of your money story.

-Learn how to break free from scarcity thinking and unlock the abundance that’s waiting for you.

Chapters

00:00 Healing Your Relationship with Money
05:37 Stop Using Money as an Excuse
10:00 Creating Abundance Through Intentionality
19:30 Aligning Values with Financial Decisions
22:18 The Importance of Values in Wealth Building
30:19 Evaluating Spending Habits for Alignment

Transcript

S2mts Values (00:01.252)
Welcome to the Manifest That Shift podcast with your girl, Kelly Noble, the Quantum Coach, your favorite business bestie and wealth activator. And today's episode, we are going to talk about how you need to stop using money as a excuse. This is part two of the impromptu series around healing your relationship with money.

So if you have not listened to last week's episode yet around healing your relationship with money and how to do that with your partner, go listen to that episode. I am going to give you a very activating exercise today on how to deepen the relationship you have with your money. And I feel like if you did listen to last week's episode yet, you can do this one still.

You know, some of the things from last episode, it's definitely going to help make this week make a lot of sense. And also, I think you can also listen to this one and then go back to that one. It still will make sense. And so this is kind of impromptu. I don't know how many parts are going to be in this series. I also have some really good interviews that I did with some women that I want to be able to drop into the lineup. So, you know, honestly, this entire podcast is about building a healthy relationship with money.

stepping into making illogical amounts of wealth, doing the thing that you love the most, creating a business from that, scaling your business and learning how to get paid to exist, stacking your millions, rewriting the rules and leaving a legacy of impact. So honestly, this isn't gonna be like an ever flowing thing, but we just completed the 30 day money manifestation challenge in the Manifest That Shift membership last month.

which is still live and active. So whenever you join the Manifest That Shift membership, you will have access to that now. And we're currently in a 30 day ask challenge, ASK ask challenge for the Manifest That Shift membership now, which has also been so beautiful because it's been amazing to witness all of these women start to ask for what they desire and what they are receiving from it. And so,

S2mts Values (02:23.48)
through the 30-day money manifestation challenge through the membership. It was just really inspiring to me to witness all of the women share so intimately about their money stories, their relationship with money. And of course, a lot of these women are wanting to make more money. They are business owners. They want to have a healthy relationship with money so they can start making more because a lot of the women have such big visions and missions. I shouldn't say a lot. All of the women have such big missions and visions.

for the world and the impact that they wanna leave requires money. This is why for me, money is so important. I truly believe that to create a more equitable world, which is my big vision and mission, it requires money and money to be in the hands of women, especially women of color and people of color, because the more money that you have,

the bigger impact you're going to have, the more of a voice you get to have, the more that you are able to pull a seat up at the table that are being ran by primarily old white men. And I'm not just saying that to be facetious. I'm saying that because it's true. We look at our government systems. We look at who's running our media. We look at everyone that is not everyone, but we're looking at the majority that is running our big corporations. It's all older.

white men, which means there's only one voice. There's only one point of view and advocacy happening and having more money means you get to now be that voice. This is why I love entrepreneurship because you are now the CEO and you get to have such a ripple effect of change and create such big ecosystems with the money that you are creating because you are now hiring intentionally. You are now hiring, whether that's a coach, whether that is

your accountant or maybe it's someone internally actually helping you build the business alongside you, you get to pay them a beautiful income. So then that gets to impact their families and just the ecosystem spreads. So that's why I was like, okay, we're doing a series. Let's, let's heal some money. I feel like there's such a big

S2mts Values (04:42.208)
Misconception and I talk about this more on the last episode around scarcity being associated with a dollar amount and that is the furthest thing from the truth. Scarcity is a frequency and energy. You can be in any tax bracket and still be in scarcity. And this is why I want to heal the relationship with money because trust me, I hear women all the time with so much money and they're like, my gosh, that is so expensive. And I'm like, bestie, what did we just?

Didn't you just make $70,000 consistently in your business like all year and now you're complaining about a $14 Erwan smoothie? Like, no, we are coming from a place of abundance. Like I know, I know that it can be different, right? Like when we don't have money and then all of sudden we get money, we expect us to all of a sudden feel abundant and that's not always the case. So let's get back on topic.

I want to just talk about how I want you to stop using money as an excuse. Money and time feel very, very similar to me because I hear a lot of the times from people, I don't have time or I don't have the money. And you're using both of those things as an excuse. So let me give you an example. So I am recording this podcast episode because I am leaving this week.

to to Sedona, but I'm going to post this while I'm still in Sedona. And so I needed to post an episode for tomorrow. I needed to post an episode for when I'm back in Sedona next week and I still need to do laundry. I still need to pack. I still need to edit these podcast episodes. I need to write the emails and have them automate so they get sent out. I need to pack. Did I say that already? I'm the worst at packing and

I need to make smushed potatoes. I forgot that I was supposed to cook those. I need to cut my husband's hair today. I, there's a lot of things on my list right now and I just don't have time and capacity for anything else. Like honestly, except for my husband came home recently. I was in the middle of recording an episode and he normally would not disturb me, but I heard him lightly tap on the door and I was like, Ooh, okay. That's weird. So he was at the gym and he came home and he said, I just hurt myself.

S2mts Values (07:02.1)
And guess what? I went from not having time because I need to get all of these things done to stopping everything to make sure that he is okay and take care of him.

We create time the same way that we create money. When it is most important to us, we figure it out. And a lot of the times when you say, don't have money or I don't have time, it's because you are afraid and you do not trust yourself within the investment.

S2mts Values (07:37.748)
Money is used as an excuse so often. And I wanna just highlight and say, sure, I may be speaking from a place of privilege, absolutely. And let's be real. How many times have you said you don't have money to invest in yourself, that you don't have money to be able to pay your debt, you don't have money to be able to do X, Y, and Z?

but you still find money to shop unconsciously and find dopamine hits on Amazon, on TikTok shop, on food, on going out to eat, on traveling, on that tattoo, on whatever it is, right? It's like, I thought we didn't have money and here we are spending all of this money on things that aren't actually aligning with our bigger mission and

vision for our financial future. So in the last episode, we talked about our wealthy life. So it's important to kind of craft out what is your wealthy life? What does this look like? What are we working towards? Because a lot of us don't know. A lot of the times when I talk to clients and it's like, how much money are we wanting to make? And I'm like, okay, what's the purpose of that? They're like, I don't know. I'm like, okay, well, let's start being very intentional.

So the exercise that I wanna lead you through is a values exercise and it's also going to lead into you looking at your bank account, which I know can be very activating for people because some people are completely avoidant in their money and they will not look at their bank account. It's something that they are, nope, let's just, nope, I don't wanna be involved, I don't wanna know, the least, I don't wanna look at it. And then there's other people that are very like...

anxiously attached to their bank account and they're checking it every five seconds. But now we're going to check it in a very intentional way. And so I want us to stop using money as an excuse. And I want us to be really, really real with what that means and why we're using it as an excuse in so many circumstances. Because the more that we focus on how we don't quote unquote have money, that is only being amplified. Our thoughts become our reality.

S2mts Values (10:00.918)
our thoughts become things. And so if we're constantly thinking on the lack and how we don't have any, that's only gonna be amplified. As opposed to thinking about how I don't have the money for this, bestie, start focusing all of your energy on how do I make more money? Period. Honestly, I could end the podcast right now. Start focusing all of your energy on how you can make more money.

And how can we look at our current finances to make sure that we are moving money in areas that still feel aligned? Because some of us may be investing money in areas that don't serve us right now in the season of our life that don't make sense right now, that we don't really care about right now. How can we start making more money? How can we start reallocating money that we currently have into areas that are going to actually be giving us an ROI, a return on our investment? What areas can...

are actually going to make us money.

I have heard from clients. I shouldn't say clients. I've heard from potential clients before on sales calls and I'm not talking about clients that are like, I don't really know. well, first of all, I don't really do sales calls unless it's people that are very interested anymore. I just don't have time and capacity, but I'll get women on sales calls and they're like, it's a full body. Yes. Like I just know that you are going to help me. I am ready to, you know, pour into my business. I'm ready to take this.

to the next level. I'm ready for X, and Z. I know that you're going to be able to support me on this journey. I trust you so much. You're the person I feel like is the only person that's going to be able to hold space for me in this season of my life, which is like the biggest compliment. But I'll get women that are like full body yeses, right? And then we get to, okay, well, this is how much it is to work with me. This is the investment. And then they're like, I don't have the money. And I'm like, okay.

S2mts Values (11:57.122)
Do really not have the money or is that an excuse because you don't trust yourself?

S2mts Values (12:04.438)
And I want to be real with that because if you wanted to find and make time or if you wanted to, if you really wanted to do all of the things that you're saying that you want to do, if you're really wanting to take your business to this space, if you're really wanting to deepen your connection with yourself and really be able to align yourself with the identity of the woman that has all of the things that you're saying you want, but now you're afraid to invest in yourself right now because you don't have the money.

Let's be real. And honestly for me, it's such a blessing that those women don't say yes because that's just a small insight on they're probably not actually going to do the things that is required of them to have what they truly want. I'm not gonna give someone a five step process. I'm not gonna give someone, I'm not gonna hold someone's hand. I am not.

That is not the type of coach that I am. I create a space where my clients are sovereign beings, which means that they have full autonomy and control of their decisions. I'm just here to mirror and reflect and expand you and help you and lay out actionable items that feel an alignment with what you are truly wanting to build in this world for you to take and run with.

And if you're already saying no to yourself at the investment piece, I can't really fully trust you are going to do it after that. So for me, it's actually a blessing. And I also know that I'm here to help women get to the place where they can actually trust themselves in this process. Trust me. I've been in situations where I financially, it does not make sense. It does not make sense to invest all of this money in.

certifications or coach or whatever. money is not coming into my business right now, but here I am spending $6,000 on the new certification. And it's not coming from a place of lack or it's going to fix me or a place of ego, but it's coming from a place of true knowing and alignment and trust and source and universe that this investment is actually going to catapult me into what I've been wanting to create and build.

S2mts Values (14:29.942)
And I say, yes, and I've taken those investments and three X them. And I know if I can three X them, can 10 X them. And if I can 10 X them, I can 100 X them. And that's a frequency of which I do not want to use money as an excuse. But I also want to make sure again, that it's not coming from a place of lack or ego, but it's coming from a place of source. It's coming from a place of trust and knowing within self.

And I'm not just creating an excuse. just did this in my business. I just invested in my business and it came and I had to ask myself, I'm like, am I saying no to myself because this is an excuse or am I saying no to myself because it's not truly aligned or am I saying yes to myself because I know that this is the thing that it's going to deepen the level of work and that like it's the gap that's missing for me. And I know that this is only going to help me embody and deepen the level of work. And this is going to alchemize into a huge ROI.

Stop using money as an excuse. And I'm not saying to go and spend frivolously. I'm not saying to go and just spend money to spend money. This is literally the point of this exercise is to make sure that you are making the most aligned decisions. Because I can't tell you how many times I've seen people say that they...

are wanting to heal their relationship with money and they are wanting to build wealth and they're getting debt paid off and they want to invest in themselves and they want to make sure that their business is growing, but they are unconsciously spending on Amazon because they need a dopamine hit or they're justifying a purchase because they are in that industry. It's like, well, you know, I do this for a living. So it makes sense that I'm like going to HomeGoods and I'm like buying this stuff. It's like, really?

How is that actually making money for you? Or are we just doing it because we're not exactly where we want to be and we need that dopamine hit and we don't know how to delay gratification. So we're just searching for anything right now to fulfill that emptiness as opposed to like really sitting with ourselves and unpacking and identifying what's truly happening in our, in our relationship with money. And we're avoiding actually healing our relationship with money and really healing our relationship with self.

S2mts Values (16:46.732)
And like, don't mean for this episode to sound kind of like bitchy, but I honestly feel like this one has to come with a level of tough love.

S2mts Values (16:57.745)
There is probably something happening at an unconscious level. Maybe it's you are wanting to create chaos within your financial situation because you have found safety in chaos before you thrive in chaos.

Maybe at an unconscious level, you don't even feel worthy of money. You don't feel worthy of being able to receive. You don't feel worthy of having it. So that's why you can't hold it. And that's why you just keep spending it unconsciously. Or maybe you have so much money. Maybe your bank account is huge, but you don't feel worthy of actually investing it in yourself because you feel selfish that you should be investing it in your children or whatever else.

Like what is happening at an unconscious level? What is happening at a nervous system body level that is preventing you from truly living your wealthy life and having this healthy relationship with money? And you're just using money as an excuse to not do what you want.

How many times are you saying that you don't have money for something, but you are getting a tattoo? You are going on another trip and it's not a trip that feels aligned with a bigger goal. You're just doing it because you want to escape.

S2mts Values (18:12.856)
How many times? You know, I'm not a big fan in cutting out things that are in our budgets. Like I don't really, I don't like the word budget either, but for the purposes of this, I don't really feel an alignment to tell someone like, don't have that coffee or don't get your nails done or don't go on the trip or whatever. But I do feel like it's important to align where we are moving our money, how we are spending our money.

to make sure that it feels in alignment with this season in our life. And if getting your nails done or going on that trip is not providing an ROI right now in your life, if you're using it as a source of numbing, if you're using it as a place to avoid, if you're using it as a place to prevent yourself from actually doing the hard thing, which is like pouring into your business,

We need to really like dive into this. I'm like being so dead ass serious. So I want to walk you through this exercise. And again, if you listened to the last episode, maybe I said it already. I can't remember. Scarcity is happening at all financial levels.

How many times are you saying that I need to work more? I need to work harder. I can't step away. I can't hire someone to fill this position, even though my business is making me feel empty. I know that I'm supposed to be doing this other thing. I know I need to be pivoting in my business, but I just need to work more in my business because I'm afraid. And if you really look at all of your financial assets and you look at your financial picture, you could literally sell your business or walk away from your business. You could sell an investment property and you can

Take years off.

S2mts Values (20:02.68)
Scarcity happens at all levels. Sometimes it's when the bank account is low and sometimes it's when the bank account was really high. Like how many times are you, are you in a financial situation where you are like killing yourself to grow this business and you're afraid to walk away? You're afraid to step away from your commitments. You're afraid to hire someone into in taking over your spot.

because of ego, even though you know your soul is supposed to be doing something else. You know the level of work is no longer aligned in this business that doesn't even feel like a part of you, who you are anymore. And you want to be pouring into your community. You want to be creating something new and different. You want to be writing a book. You want to be doing more advocacy work. You want to be doing whatever else, but you are too afraid to step away because of scarcity.

Even though financially on paper, if you looked at it, you're like, I could totally walk away from my business for 10 years and I would be fine. But I'm afraid. So again, this is like happening at all levels and I'm seeing it with clients at all levels. I work with clients that are brand new in entrepreneurship and I work with clients that are already making multiple seven figures in their businesses. I work with clients at all income brackets.

women that have so much debt and they like are not making that much money in their businesses yet. And I work with women that have so much fricking money and yet they are still in scarcity. It's wild. Like I really like, I hope that this podcast helps open the picture of this is such a universal problem. It is such a bigger problem than what social media portrays.

Because just because you see someone flexing on social media does not mean they have money. I won't even get into stories around that. So let's get into the exercise, okay? Let's get into the purpose of this. I wanted to keep this like short and quick. So again, how are we actually making the correct aligned decisions in our businesses right now, to create our financial future, to create this wealthy life that we want if we don't actually have the values?

S2mts Values (22:18.88)
Values for me is like the most foundational thing that we can do. If you're feeling out of alignment, values. If you're feeling overwhelmed and chaotic, values. If you're feeling like you don't know what direction to take next, values. Anytime that you have uncertainty, values. It is the easiest practical exercise that you can do to really help you align your energy into what are you supposed to be doing? Your values are your North Star and they should be rediscovered.

and addressed constantly because as you grow and evolve and change, as your three world shifts and change and things happen in your life, your values are constantly changing too.

And so really laying and crafting this out is going to be so important when we think about our wealthy life and your business and your business finances. So I want you to think about what are your current values, especially when you kind of think about like money, your business, where you currently are in your life, what are the big values for you right now? And I want you to kind of brain dump them. The first ones that are gonna come to your mind are gonna be the ones that are happening unconsciously. So trust that, trust your intuition.

write them down. I want minimum of five, maximum of 10, write them down. So when I think about my values right now, my life right now, my business right now, some of my core values are health,

S2mts Values (23:48.236)
Business growth?

S2mts Values (23:52.778)
assets, like wealth building things, investments.

S2mts Values (24:02.626)
play.

So those are some of mine. So now I want you to take those and I want you to rank them one through 10 or one through five, however many that you have from most important to least important.

And then once you do that, I want you to rank each one individually, one through 10. One being, I am not aligned with this value and being aligned with this value means that you are actively every single day participating in this value.

S2mts Values (24:37.24)
So I want you to rank them one through 10. And if it's a one on all of these, that's okay. Cause it's one of two things that are being displayed. One, it's not actually your value. Your values are only your values if you are actively living by them. And a lot of the time ego can make us feel like, this is my value. This is important. This is how I live my life. But if your actions are not truly aligning, that's just your ego. Like be real with yourself. Or two,

It is a value, this is really important to you. And now we know that this is where we need to pour more of our energy into.

S2mts Values (25:11.158)
rank each one one through 10 and take an honest, curious approach to this. And again, this is not to leave with shame. This is to lead with growth and expansion and learning and evolution. The more that we can be real with ourselves and take radical responsibility for where we are, the more that we can embody what we are doing and actually make the changes.

S2mts Values (25:36.512)
And now I want you to look at your bank account and I want you to look at what you are spending and where you are spending. And I want you to see how they align or don't align with the values you just put in place. For example, if your values right now are health and you are going to McDonald's,

All of the time.

There's a disconnect.

S2mts Values (26:11.208)
if one of your core values right now is to move into investments, wealth building assets, and you're going to Louis Vuitton, and that Louis Vuitton budget is well above what you are investing in assets,

you need to have a conversation with yourself. If you are saying that you are valuing investing in yourself, maybe it's continued education, hiring a coach, whatever it may be, and you're just spending on Amazon Prime.

behind a bunch of stuff you don't need.

You need to have a conversation with yourself. Your bank account will be the clearest indicator of, are you actually aligned with these values? And so when I think about me, like sometimes it can be complicated too, right? So some of my core values, one of my top values is holding money right now, holding money because I'm in a position where I don't, I don't have, I don't feel like I'm in a financial,

overflow to be able to just be spending on play, even though play is one of my biggest values right now. But holding money is more important. So that makes that is making me hold myself accountable to make sure that holding money is important and a priority investing in myself. So if I'm, if I'm moving money, it needs to be in these top core things. if investing money in play, which I have been doing a lot lately, so like I'm being real with myself and you right now.

S2mts Values (28:00.14)
I've been spending and moving money a lot into play, but that's not aligning with holding money and making sure I'm being very intentional on where I'm moving the money. So I need to reevaluate and look at play in a new way. Okay. Am I justifying it? It's like, well, you we went to that concert and we're going out every weekend and we're, you know, we're, we're doing all these experiences and I'm doing all of this because I want to make sure I'm playing.

because that is a core value for me right now? Am I just doing that because it's putting me in a space that feels more scarce? Am I doing that because it's a place of ego? Am I doing that to justify some of these expenses? Or I need to get real with myself and be like, okay, some of these things need to go and play for me needs to Play for me needs to look like more creative outlets and do things that are more free, like to be really real.

For example, for the retreat even for the retreat, have got to shoots and the goddess shoots. think there were like 450 bucks or something, 475, something like that, which is a steal of a deal with this level of photographer and how many photos you get and all of this stuff. And if I'm investing in myself, that's one of my values. I can easily justify this photo shoot is while I'm investing in my business right now, all of my money is going into investments.

I can use these photos for social media. can use these photos for my website. I can use these photos for branding and all of this stuff. Yes, that's true. And is this, is this really feeling like it's an alignment or am I just justifying it to make me feel good and to have the dopamine hit and to be like, well, you know, I'm following my values in this, but it's really making me feel more in scarcity. It's making me feel more chaotic. It's not making me feel like I'm in a space of overflow and

Did I even use all of the photos from last year? And I also have photos from my retreat that was in June. I can also take photos at the retreat myself. I don't need to necessarily invest in the photographer to get the photos or the content. Do I also need like print content, like print photos? I need actually videos. That's actually more an investment in my business right now. So it's like being really, really real with yourself because you can easily justify to kind of manipulate these into your values.

S2mts Values (30:19.136)
And so I have to be real with myself. I'm not going to invest in that photo shoot. It doesn't make sense right now. It doesn't align with all of the other values that I have. I need to reevaluate how much I'm spending in play and still keep play because it is important, but doing them in new ways because holding money right now is more important for me because I just invested in a new certification program that's going to be 10 months long. And that was a big investment.

But I also know that that investment is going to have a big ROI in my business. I'm looking for things that are going to give me an ROI right now. I'm here to make money, pour into investments, whether that's myself or like tangible things. That's the season I'm in. It's not doing photo shoots and doing these other things. So I want you to really look at your bank account and see how does this translate to here and be real. Like look at those accounts and say, how did this make me feel? Why did I, why did I

invest this money into this specific area? Was it because I was bored? Was it because I needed to feel like I fit in with somebody in a friend group? Right now, is your top priority holding money and health and yet you're going to dinner all of the time with your friends? Okay, well, should you be doing maybe like walk dates with your friends instead?

helps align both of those. You're outside, you're being active, you're in nature, you're moving your body, and it's also free. What do you need to do to shift to really align where you're spending your money and how you're spending your money with these values? So have fun with this exercise. cannot wait to hear what you were gonna say in my DMs.

Honestly, I am still in awe when I get messages in my DMs about how I just listened to your podcast and this was amazing, but I have questions about this. I'm still in awe. I'm like, wow, people listen to this. This is so freaking cool. And I love the community and connections that come from this podcast because we have the most incredible conversations in my DMs from this. And also there is a text feature in the podcast.

S2mts Values (32:35.896)
You can go to the show notes. can literally text me questions. So if you have questions, since we're on this money healing kind of Avenue, text me questions that you have and I can answer them on the podcast. I actually love answering questions. It's so much easier for me. That's like, that's where my zone of genius kicks in of like answering questions. I would love for you to ask questions, even feedback. I'm just like, I loved hearing this. This is amazing. Can you go more in depth in this? I didn't understand what you meant. Love all of that.

Plus just connect with me. I love connecting with people. One of my core values right now is community. So yes, please slide in those DMs. I invite you. You're not bugging me, bothering me. I freaking love it. I love talking to my community.

And if you could leave a five star review, I would appreciate it so much. If you're on Apple listening to this, please leave a positive review because I'm sensitive and I don't want to deal with haters right now. I'm just can't. And honestly, if you don't have anything nice to say, just don't say anything at all. And then, yeah, I would also send this to a friend. If you want to go on this healing journey, it will be so nourishing if you can do it with a friend that is.

an expander for you that is one of your biggest cheerleaders that is super supportive for you. Listen to these episodes and do these exercises together and talk about them. The best way to heal is to do it in community. So if you can do it with somebody, maybe it's your partner, whatever that looks like, send it to them and say, hey, I know this is going to be like really activating, but like we are stepping into our wealthy life. Let's do this together. Send it to them. It would be so much fun. I just held space for that group of women.

and we talked about healing our money and it was honestly so beautiful. were friends for so long and they never had conversations like this around money and it was so eye-opening and it was so healing and it was so beautiful because they got to witness how they didn't feel so alone on this journey. It was just pure magic. So have fun. I love you all. I'll see you next week. I don't know what episode is going to launch next week. Maybe it's a healing one. Maybe it's an interview. I'm not sure yet.

S2mts Values (34:46.24)
but I will be here next week. I love you all so much and yeah, have a great day. Can't wait to hear from you.